Wanna know a lil secret?

I was the guy who'd overthink EVERYTHING when it came to women.

I'd literally rehearse entire conversations in my head...

Plan out the "perfect" opening line...

Tell myself "next time I see her I'm gonna be confident and just go for it"...

But guess what happened when the moment came?

I FROZE.

Complete blank. Like my brain just shut off.

And I'm not talking about just once or twice...

This happened over and over and over again.

Multiple 'effin times.

I know, I know... it's embarrassing.

But the crazy part is...

Growing up in Nigeria, I was actually the COMPLETE opposite of this.

I was expressive, creative, loved dancing and art.

But that wasn't exactly "celebrated" in my culture.

So I learned to hide who I really was...

Put on this mask of being "serious"...

Suppress all that creativity and expression just to fit in...

Then when I moved to the U.S. in 2018?

It got even WORSE.

Not only was I already hiding behind this mask...

But now I felt like I didn't belong ANYWHERE.

The culture shock hit me like a freight train...

I started putting people on pedestals - especially white American women...

Trying to become what I thought they wanted me to be...

And that voice in my head kept saying...

"You're not good enough, you're not good enough, you're not good enough..."

Here's where it gets really messed up though:

On the outside, I looked like I had my life together.

I dressed well...

Had a decent social media following...

People probably looked at me and thought "this dude's confident"...

But inside?

Pure CHAOS.

I'd replay every awkward interaction for DAYS...

Torture myself thinking about what I should've said differently...

And when it came to approaching women?

My heart would beat so loud I swear they could hear it from across the room.

I genuinely started believing something was wrong with me...

Like I was missing some "confidence gene" that everyone else got.

It got so bad in 2022 that I was ready to give up completely.

My business failed.

I couldn't hold a decent conversation to save my life.

I had ZERO charisma.

I was literally at rock bottom.

Ready to give up on everything...

But by God's grace and this incredible act of kindness from someone at my church who offered me a place to stay...

I finally had the space to breathe...

To think...

To really look at MYSELF in the mirror without all the noise and distractions...

For the first time in years, I had time to actually introspect...

And that's when it hit me like a ton of bricks...

Nobody's coming to save me from this.

If I wanted things to change, I had to do something about it.

So I started treating confidence like a muscle...

Hit the gym every day even when I felt like garbage...

Forced myself to read psychology books...

Started approaching strangers just to practice...

Was it terrifying? Hell yeah.

Did I fail? Over and over again.

But something weird started happening...

Each time I pushed through the fear, I got a little stronger...

Each awkward conversation taught me something new...

Each workout built up this thing called self-respect I'd never felt before...

And slowly but surely I became the man I always wanted to be.

Now I help other overthinkers make the same transformation.

Because here's what I learned...

Confidence isn't something you're born with.

It's something you "forge", one uncomfortable moment at a time.

And if a socially anxious kid from Nigeria who learned to hide behind masks his whole life can figure this out...

So can you.

This isn't theory for me, bro.

This is the life I literally had to fight for.